Eenie meenie minie moe- what was that part about the tiger again?

But female cops always give me an erection, Officer

This is the part where Easter Pig learns the true meaning of Christmas!

Every Weatherman is either a homosexual or a robot... if you don't believe me take a look at the one you're with

This antique wicker gazebo is where I pork all my lady friends

My Dad's so old he remembers when Alec Baldwin was good-looking

FOX News is the next best thing to having Dick Cheney fuck you in the ass

What are the odds that the hive is full and the bees inside are furious?

Luckily I got one of those prisons where they let you keep your harmonica

The Bishop informs me that a bloody nose is not technically stigmata

My wife has a stuttering vagina and I can't get a cock in edgewise

Somedays I piss my pants just to spite my dry-cleaner

If cats always land on their feet, how do you explain that first dozen?

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