Let's Fuck With Pizza Hut
[The following is a transcript of a phone call I placed on May 29th, 2o15]
Pizza Hut: Thank you for calling Pizza Hut, this is Erica- what can I get for you?
Sick City: What’s good tonight?
PH: Um, good tonight?
SC: What’s fresh and exciting? Surprise me!
(dead silence)
PH: All the pizza is fresh. Pizza.
SC: To tell you the truth I don’t even know if I feel like pizza. Sell me! Convince me. That it’s a good-
PH: Do you want to order a pizza?
SC: What do you want on that pizza?
PH: What do I want?
SC: You sound like a pepperoni girl... do you believe in pepperoni?
[long pause]
PH: Yeah, we have pepperoni.
SC: What do you like? What do you like on your pepperoni pizza?
PH: My pepperoni pizza?
SC: What turns you on? Sexually? Do you like to be-
PH: This call is all kinds of uncomfortable. I don’t think-
SC: Can I spank you and call you Katie?
PH: Oh my god…
[click]
SC: Hello? Hello?!? Katie, are you there?
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