Have you seen my daughter's impression of a coked-up prostitute?

Vengeance is mine, but occasionally I loan it to my neighbor

      If a tree falls in the woods and I don't give a shit can I go home now?

Fungus views my underwear as its summer home

Heads up: The bib is coming back in a big way

Shame on you, Santa Claus, for raping my daughter yet again

I always take a lethal dump before the plumber comes, just to get my money's worth

It's official: Puerto Rican teens still give the world's fastest handjobs

Church helps me see things from Satan's point of view

If my wife can take a hot dog in two bites why is fellatio such a baffling ordeal?

Ugly people of my neighborhood: please seek alternate housing!

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